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In loving memory of Mia Gerontakos

By Sophia Gerontakos

Every little life matters and deserves to be celebrated

I created this page for Say Their Name Day to raise funds for Sands and Red Nose so they can continue their important work supporting bereaved families across Australia.

If you can support my fundraiser, you will be helping to bring care and comfort to families when they need it most. Without the support from Sands and Red Nose I would not have survived the loss of my daughter Mia. Especially having consciously conceived Mia as a single person, and having her stillbirth occur at Christmas when people were busy and away on holidays I felt very isolated. Red Nose support groups, support and grief workers and resources kept me afloat (and continue to) and I will be eternally grateful for that. Regardless of circumstances, every family grieving their child needs appropriate and sensitive support that often others in your life cannot or don't know how to provide, and Sands and Red nose provide this in a completely accessible way. They even support the people in your life who are not sure how to support you but want to.

Every dollar raised helps support bereaved families by making sure every family has access to the information and networks they need to move forward and rebuild their lives, now and in the future. 

That means timely access to information resources, an understanding voice on the end of the phone, and an ongoing connection with other families through support groups and remembrance activities.

So please, help me raise much-needed funds to ensure every bereaved family has access to the support they need, for as long as they need it. And please read mine and Mia's story below in the updates to understand this experience and the crucial role of red nose and sands.

Thank you.

Please make a donation below

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My Updates

The story of me and Mia

Wednesday 8th Mar
Mia was a donor conceived little love after I made the decision to consciously conceive a child as a single person. Myself and my close family and friends all felt connected to her while she was growing in my womb, and we all felt she had a very happy little spirit. She was so active in her little somersault space in my belly. Because I spent a lot of days and hours being scanned when we started to discover things weren’t right with her, myself and my mum (who has been my incredible primary support person through my pregnancy and Mia’s birth and death) spent a lot of time observing and engaging with her on the screen. Every time I had a scan a little hand would go right up as though she was waving at us, and when we were trying to do the amniocentesis test it took so long because she kept putting her little bum in the way. Us and the medical attendants all agreed she was a bit cheeky and had a sense of humour. Even though my hopes and plans for our life together are lost and it is very painful, I still feel her light happy energy around me most of the time. 

Mia's due date was 26th April 2023 but she was born still at 22 weeks gestation on the 22nd December 2022, after being diagnosed with multiple massive organ complications and trisomy 18. When I was given Mia’s diagnosis and understood that she would not survive, I had to make the most difficult and heart breaking decision of my life to be induced at 22 weeks – referred to in the medical world as termination for medical reasons (TFMR) – however, I find this terminology very problematic as it implies you had a choice which isn’t accurate. With Mia’s diagnosis she could not survive outside my body and was going to die when she was born (if not before),  the only little bit of control I had as her mother was around the timing and how peaceful and loving her departure from this world would be. If the pregnancy progressed further, Mia would be born trying to breathe in a body that couldn’t sustain breath or life outside her mothers body, and have a few short and very distressing moments in this world before dying. I didn’t want that for her so I carried her for as long as I could safely, so that she could have a peaceful and loving transition only having known the warm happy somersault space of my womb. I chose the most painful choice for myself knowing it was the only loving path forward for her. 

When I gave birth to Mia, she was born en caul - this is when the waters don't break and the baby is born inside the still in-tact amniotic sac. It is very rare and very special and when this occurred I knew her life and transition onwards had been as loving and peaceful as it could have been. She died in her warm happy place. I will never forget the feeling of her warm little body resting on my chest, and our short time together in the hospital. And I will never forget the pain of leaving the hospital without my baby girl. Even though my hopes and plans for our life together are lost and it is very painful, I still feel her light happy energy around me most of the time. 

Mia was born and died right before Christmas, so nearly all of my friends and network were away and consumed in the holiday season and I felt very alone. Luckily, I had my amazing mum staying with me at the time and totally keeping me afloat and alive, but mum also had her own grief of losing her grandchild and watching her daughter labour and birth her still baby. Red nose and sands had some really helpful resources online that we referred to and early on we both called the 24/7 support line at different times. But I think the support that has really helped me the most from red nose has been the regular stillbirth and TFMR support groups. Supporting a loved one who has had this experience can be so difficult for friends and family who have never been touched in that way, and connecting in small groups with other people who have been through it and understand all the plethora of complicated experiences, thoughts and emotions that follows (without having to spell out every word of the story) is just so valuable. I continue to attend monthly support groups with red nose, and it's for all these reasons that I am here raising awareness of their invaluable service to supporting bereaved families through the most painful time of their life, and am asking anyone in a position to do so to support with a donation or share to keep this support accessible. They have been there for me and so many others in our hardest and darkest times.

Thank you to my Sponsors

$106

Becky Floros

Mia is so loved, and so missed.

$106

Jacqui Fahey

🙏

$106

Christine Houghton

My heart goes out to you after reading your story - the story of your sweet little girl embedded in the story of your unfathomable grief I read between the lines. Sending you warmth, understanding and the hope that at some time in the future when the grief subsides, the experience has somehow enriched you.

$55.12

George

❤️❤️❤️

$55.12

Hannah Boyd

$55.12

Alana Gall

My heart breaks for you Sophia and your mum... thank you for sharing your story for this cause, that cannot have been easy... I am so happy to hear Mia's spirit is still with you xxx sending love to you and your mum during this extremely difficult time... xxx

$55.12

John Anthony Stevens

Your story is so powerful and puts life in perspective. I am the parent of 5 and my heart breaks thinking about what has happened to you and your daughter. Please let me know if there is anything I can do to help. John

$52

Vladi Rosolova

$22

Michelle And Robbie

$21.20

Karlyn Gibson

$21.20

Louise Casson

Thank you for sharing your story Sophia and highlighting the amazing support you received from Sands & Red Nose.

$20

Sophia Gerontakos

$20

Cathrina Geldard

$20

Kate Summer